“For if I do this of my own will, I have a reward, but if not of my own will, I am still entrusted with a stewardship.”
— 1 Corinthians 9:17
“Faithfulness in little things is a big thing.”
— St. John Chrysostom
WHEN DESIRES AND DUTY DON'T ALIGN
Most of my young adult life I’ve wrestled with the concepts of passion, purpose, and duty. I find myself at times asking a question along these lines:
What do I do when I don’t desire to do the thing that God has put before me?
Not out of rebellion.
Not because I don’t believe it’s good.
But because it doesn’t align with my current desire.
I want to be someone who lives from passion. Who works with joy. Who steps into calling with a whole heart.
But if I’m honest, there are times when the work feels weighty.
When I don’t feel the thrill.
When I’m not motivated.
When the obedience is dry.
And last week, while reading through 1 Corinthians, I stopped on a verse I’ve read multiple times that landed with a surprisingly fresh vision:
“If I do this of my own will, I have a reward, but if not of my own will, I am still entrusted with a stewardship.”
It felt like Paul was reaching through the page and naming the tension.
That line, “I am still entrusted with a stewardship”, settled into me.
Walking with God isn’t always about desire.
It’s is about stewardship.
THE FALSE CHOICE WE'RE GIVEN
We live in a world of extremes.
On one end: “Just grind. Show up. Be disciplined. Your feelings don’t matter.”
On the other: “Follow your passion. Trust your desires. Don’t force anything.”
One side sells stoic endurance.
The other sells soft emotionalism.
And in this pendulum culture, most of us are stuck swinging between the two.
We discipline ourselves into burnout, then collapse into apathy.
We ride the high of passion until it fades, then question our calling altogether.
But what if there’s a third way?
What if purpose lives not at the extremes, but in the middle space where obedience overrides emotions and stewardship surpasses sensation?
PAUL: A DISCIPLINED MAN
It’s easy to romanticize Paul.
To imagine him always fired up, always convicted, always ready to suffer for the gospel.
But read his words closely and you’ll see something different.
He talks often about being compelled to preach.
About not always doing it out of desire, but still doing it out of faithfulness.
“Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel,” he says in the verse just before (v. 16).
Not “I love preaching every time.”
Not “I feel fully inspired today.”
But “Woe to me if I don’t.”
That’s the language of stewardship. That’s the voice of someone who carries weight, not just fire.
MOTIVATION IS A GIFT, NOT A GUARANTEE
There are days when the desires align beautifully.
You’re passionate about the work.
You’re excited to build.
You’re ready to love.
You’re eager to give.
Those days are a gift.
But they aren’t guaranteed.
And more importantly, they aren’t required.
Because you aren’t just operating from desire.
You’re operating from assignment.
You don’t only show up when it feels good.
You show up because you were entrusted with something.
That’s what Paul is saying:
I don’t always do this of my own will, but I still do it. Because it was given to me. I’ve been entrusted with this story. And I’m going to steward it.
CALLING OVER COMFORT. ASSIGNMENT OVER APPLAUSE
This framework has changed how I view certain parts of my life.
Parenting doesn’t always come from desire. It often comes from stewardship. The midnight wakeups. The messy moments. The tantrums. The mundane consistency of showing up even when I don’t “feel like it.” It’s not performance, it’s obedience.
Marriage doesn’t always flow from romantic highs. Sometimes it’s fought for through quiet surrender, daily sacrifice, and thousands of little choices to love even when you’re tired.
Friendship isn’t always exciting. Sometimes it’s driving across town when you’d rather rest. It’s checking in on someone when no one’s checking in on you.
Your job might not be your dream role. But maybe it’s your current assignment. Maybe it’s where God’s placed you, not because it thrills you, but because it forms you.
And the moment we reframe these things not as burdens, but as an opportunity for stewardship, we begin to walk differently.
We stop resenting what God gave us and we begin to steward it.
STEWARDSHIP IS NOT SENTIMENT
The world will try to convince you that fulfillment only comes when passion and purpose perfectly align.
And when they don’t, you must be in the wrong place.
But Scripture tells a different story.
It tells the story of Moses, reluctant and afraid, still leading.
Of Jeremiah, depressed and discouraged, still prophesying.
Of Jesus, sweating blood in Gethsemane, still obeying.
Many of the most redemptive stories in history weren’t fueled by sheer desire.
They were carried by faithfulness. By stewardship. By people who said, “Not my will, but yours."
A FINAL CHARGE
So if you find yourself in a season where your motivation feels low, where the joy feels distant, and the task in front of you feels heavy, I want to encourage your heart:
You are not in the wrong place just because it’s hard.
You’re likely stewarding something sacred.
The world says:
Only do it if it makes you happy.
But God says:
Do it because I gave it to you.
Do it because it matters.
Do it because I’m with you in it.
Don’t wait for passion to carry you.
Don’t wait until you “want it” to be faithful.
Desire may come and go.
But the call remains.
The mission remains.
The reward remains.
So take the next step.
Love the people entrusted to you.
Build with what’s in your hands.
Serve even when it’s quiet.
Pray even when it’s dry.
Show up because you were given something worth stewarding.
Even when you don’t feel like it.
Even when it’s not your will.
You’ve still been entrusted with it.
And that’s enough.
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